Be PRESENT in the present GRATEFULLY!

"There is in every woman's heart a Spark of heavenly fire which lies dormant in the broad daylight of prosperity, but which kindles up and beams and blazes in the dark hour of adversity"

It is a great feeling been able to find His light within me through my past adversities. And joyfully today in my moments of prosperity, I'm able to keep that fire Lit Up within me, reminding myself TO REMAIN grateful for everything He has given me today! 

"If you must look back do so FORGIVINGLY, if you will look forward do so PRAYERFULLY, But the wisest course would be to BE PRESENT in the present GRATEFULLY." 

I am Present TODAY, with a grateful Heart and in a relentless and passionate pursuit to chase after Him until I am completely clear and realize that He is the ONLY LOVE of my Life. I pray and pray harder that my heart will stay rooted within Him so that THE man He has for me can ONLY find me Through Him! 

Is one of the hardest prayers my heart carries because as humans we always want our way, but I stay grounded and rooted in Him because everything that comes through Him is not just good, But Amazingly GREAT!! . 

I pray today that you are ENCOURAGED in Him, that you know how BEAUTIFUL YOU are, and that He LOVES you deeply! 

Thank you Jesus! 

Much Love as Always,

<3 Besos <3 

#divacheckingout

Dare to go BEYOND your Limits!!

As usual a little MIA from my blog but, I promise I will get back on the blog wagon soon.

I'm in such a High of life right now. All these challenges I've faced in these past 2 years just to get established with my 2 children from my cross country move and starting in a different state over 4,000 miles away from where it was my home for 13 years has been quite THE JOURNEY! 

But this year seeing our life coming together, not the way I planned it or intended to be, it has been an amazing thing... Challenges, Risks and All. 

I feel blessed, I have grown as a women and mother even more because I'm always receptive to the lessons my unique journey provides for me. I am only STRONG, and beautiful because of God's Strength and Love. I am so grateful of the opportunities He has given me and the ones that will keep coming along the way. 

I was reminded today at our Church Service, the place I was years ago, and how amazingly graceful God has been to me. 

I hope that today if you believe in God, your Strength and hope are renew. 

And If you Stopped believing in Him Long time ago, because of Hurt, Disappointments, Judgements of "Christians" ... Would you look at my life? My soul? My Good intentions and my Life inspiration?! And if I tell you that everything in my life only Mirrors His amazing Spirit within Me.... Would you believe in Him again??!! 

My hope and prayer is that you do!!!! We don't need to be perfect, I am NOT perfect, and Will never Be and God knows that! 

"I bear MANY scars, but I also carry with me moments that would not have happened if I had NOT DARED to go beyond my Limits" - Paulo Coelho 

It is because His Faithfulness that I Dare to go BEYOND my Limits!!!!!! Woot Woot!!! 

I hope all of you Beautiful People have a Fantastic Sunday!!! 

As always Much LOVE, 

 <3 Besos <3 Muah!! :-*

Pray. Share a Smile. Give a Hug. Lend a Hand.

 I have been a little "MIA" from the "Facebook scene" and blog too.

 Life has become busy, but productive all in a good way. It has allowed me to Refocus, reset my mindset and to evaluate those things and values that are important for the new life I am building with my children. 

And well here I am wanting to give all of you a little update about us. =D 

I am always grateful to all of you out there that genuinely care, have inspired, cheered on and kept us in your prayers. 

Well, 2014 a year I claimed to be of VICTORY, a year of reaping the good things after all the tears, challenges and perseverance over every single obstacle that came my way. 

I continue to move and push forward because I want nothing more that to become the human being I am destined to be. I'm relentless to fulfilled the special purpose God has set aside for me and to leave a real legacy in this world behind. Whether a tiny little seed, a footprint or a mark that will change someone's life is more than enough for me. 

And well, I want to share the new journey I am about to embark......

It has been in my heart for many, many years to be a missionary, an advocate, a voice to those that don't have any. Whether locally, internationally it never mattered to me as long as it was to serve and so my missionary heart has always long for an opportunity like this. 

One of my goals this year was to give more of my time to others and to INVEST in something "fruitful". And soooo here I Am....... An opportunity became available for me to serve to Africa this Summer!!!!! 

As you can imagine, I am Very excited, anxious, Excited, nervous of the unknown, excited, prayful, excited, blessed and YES EXCITED!! LOL! 

And well you know how much I love COUNTDOWNS, so here it is...... 

Countdown has BEGUN and I am super Happy to be sharing my excitement with all of you!!!! 

So YES People, my name is Marisabel Matta. I am a Single Mom, a business woman, a student, a mover and a SHAKER, Survivor, an advocate and now a Missionary!!!! 

No. I am NOT Super Woman!!!

I am an ordinary person JUST like YOU, with an unbelievable determination, a vision and a PASSION to follow my purpose and DREAMS..... Woot Woot!!! 

Please, please PRAY and PRAY some more as I embark on this wonderful journey. I will be visiting Mbare, Rwanda in Africa on a missionary trip from our church ( Highland Park Church in Lakeland) with 10 others. 

Rwanda in east-central Africa is surrounded by the Denocratic Republic of the Congo, Uganda, Tanzania and Burundi. 

It is slightly smaller than Maryland. In 100 days, beginning in April 1994, Hutu rampaged through the country and slaughtered an estimated 800,000 Tutsi and their moderate Hutu sympathized. After the violence was ceased, the country began to rebuild and put together the pieces that were left. Highland Park Church sent a team to Rwanda in Aug 2011 to begin work on a 4 classroom building in Mbare village. The building has since been completed and are partnering with missionaries there to begin construction on an addition to the building adding 2 more classrooms and restrooms. 

We also will try to provide more school supplies and I will be working on soliciting donations to different companies on dental supplies to provide some education on dental hygiene for the children!!! =D

Each one of us have to raise at least $3,000 to cover for travel costs and in addition we will be doing our best to get as many school supplies as we can. 

Please, please keep us in your prayers. 

If you feel led to make a donation no matter how big or small inbox me. Money will NOT be payable directly to me but to the church into my "trip account" I can send the link to those interested and it will be tax deductible. Now, please don't feel obligated as this is NOT the purpose of my post. Prayer in itself means the world to ME!! ;-) please LIKE and SHARE this post to all of your friends. I would so appreciated it. 

"Our lives Begin to End the Day we Become SILENT about things that matter ~ Marthin Luther King Jr~

Thank you for helping me keep the FIRE God has set DEEP down in my soul. I pray that not only my words but my ACTIONS serve as an inspiration and will touch the hearts of many. 

Remember, in the words of the wonderful Martin Luther King Jr:" Life's most persistent and URGENT question is, What are you doing for others?!" 

YES, What are WE doing for others?! 

Pray. Share a Smile. Give a hug. Lend a Hand.

As always, Much Love to all.

Diva is checking out.

Muah! <3 Besos <3 

Celebrating Healing and Freedom

It has been a while since I posted on my blog.

 Life's been busy and challenging... In a good way this time. :-) 

I can't believe it's been 2 years in FL already, I still miss Cali but I'm excited of how well things are turning out here for all of us. 

Just recently I've decided to attempt finish reading this book:

"Why does He do that? Inside the minds of Angry and Controlling Men" by Lundy Brancroft

It was reccomended to me years ago by a great friend of mine.. My dear Katy who was and still is such a great support to me while going through my separation. 

 At the time, I was not yet strong enough to digest all the information and got very overwhelmed, so I stopped reading it and put it away.  

But, recently after a few conversations and some experiences other friends are going through, I remembered and decided to dig into it. After almost 4 years of freedom and challenges I am at a healthy place in my life where I can process and digest all this information. And the wonderful thing is that it has made me realize how much I have healed and moved forward from that past experience. I'm still on the road of emotional healing and recovery, but I can sure confirm that I'm emotional, spiritual and physically healthy in the midst of my past.  I made the decision to make changes in my life, to stand up for myself and the things that are not right. I now surround myself with people that respect me and understand my value and I eliminated the people in my life that did not appreciate me and decided to build my foundation with God. 

It's a great book and I encourage anyone to read it. Whether married, single, in a relationship, going through a divorce or even if you have a teenage daughter. I wished I had this book in my hands as a teenager, but with my life experiences, knowledge and wisdom, I know better now to not JUMP into a relationship or something quick, only for the simple fact of feeling lonely or desperate for some attention....<<< Amen! For that...;-) 

Choosing the road to be free of abuse is not an easy one, especially if it entails becoming a single mother and dealing with your healing and tending of  precious little ones. 

But I am a living proof that it can be done. 

Being single is not easy at times too, but it is always good to remember to enjoy the seasons of your life as they are only temporary. 

While on this season, I have learn a lot about myself... I've been determined to find myself again, to nurture my desires and to focus on becoming the person I am destined to be. 

And I am doing all of that with great SUCCESS!

Remember that:" Genuine love means respecting the humanity of the other person, wanting what is best for him or her, and supporting the other person's self-esteem and independence. This kind of love is incompatible with abuse and coercion."

And a "mind that is stretched by a New Experience can never go Back"

And so, my mind is never going BACK... Moving FORWARD!!

As always, 

Much Love! 

This Diva is checking out!!

<3 Besos <3 

#healinginMotion #standupToAbuse

#getknowledge #identify #makechanges #inspiration #divawisdom

LIFE is NOTHING but PURE MAGIC!

With Everything that has gone through in the past few years in my life. I've become fascinated  with butterflies, because that's how my Mommy compares and inspires my journey. In the beginning, she used to tell me...:

        "You are in a metamorphosis in your life. Keep it up, have faith and really soon you will become like a butterfly. You will FLY with all your beautiful rainbow colors. Do NOT get WEARY... You can do it!!!"...

So I took a pic when I saw this little visitor on my window this morning. :-D   

But I couldn't helped to notice that this little cute butterfly was hanging upside down. And of course A Diva like ME couldn't help but wonder..!! ;-) 

I remember one time vividly, when I was recently separated almost going on a year of going through my divorce process at the time. ((in and out of court in a stressful and delicate situation, w/ a Restraining order against my ex))

and I had to move from a 3,400 square feet home with 2 babies (4yr old at the time and a baby girl that barely turned a year)

no family close, just me and a few good friends.

And I remember packing and handling that move on my own...it was exhausting!! I felt like that house was a Big Monster that was going to eat me alive, it was draining my energy. I packed a total of 120 some boxes roughly
 (big boxes too w/ out counting furniture)

it took me almost a few weeks just to get all that shit together and it was never ending.
  
 But half way there, I remember one day I was sooo exhausted it was never ending packing, and still didn't had things all figured out yet. Everything and I mean EVERYTHING, but clothes was going straight to 2 big storage units... Because I was fixing to move to a friends apartment until I can figure out a quick plan. And I was also training for my comp at the time

 ( had no idea how I pull all that Shit together on my Own))
 

And I remember that day, I've pack almost like 30 boxes without having any much sleep.. And I was so exhausted I felt like QUITING!
I was DONE.. Drained.... I mean exhausted of LIFE.

I went to a corner inside my walking closet, kiddies were sleeping and I scrunched myself down in a corner, knees up, head down and I started crying to the point of been hyperventilating and gasping for air.


I called my mom crying hysterically telling her:
 "I dont think I can do This, I can't anymore, this is it... I am DONE, I Quit!! I CAN'T anymore, why me??? I try and try my hardest, but why do I need to go through this ON MY OWN???!!!"

And my Mom to my surprise, started telling me a story about a butterfly

 (let me just tell ya, she always does THIS.. Lol! most of the time she speaks to me in metaphors, and is funny, but I usually get the message better that way too.. Lol! Go figure!)

But anyway, she went onto tell me that it was part of my "metamorphosis".. She told me that I was inside the Cocoon O_o
and that

"God was telling me to get out of the cocoon because your gotta get ready to fly and you are wanting to stay there...!!!" 

Believed me, from crying I Busted it out laughing and I told my mom:

" Well, to b honest, whooooo said I'm ready to fly??! I want to stay in this little cocoon forever, as matter of fact I want to stich it up a bit more stronger so it won't open!.. How's That???!!! ... " lol!

 And my mom told me with a smile on her voice,

" Well, my daughter when God  says you are ready... It doesn't matter what you think.... >> you are READY! ".. And so it's time to get out of the Cocoon" 

 

So you need to Get up, grab another Box, fill it up.. Close it, move it down stairs and repeat.. One at a time.. When u get tired, stop and cry .. Let it out, wipe your tears and do it All over again until it's Done!!.... You can do it I believe in You!! "

And I Did!!

Even to this day, that right there brings tears to my eyes.

 

And u know what's funny ??.. That was only the beginning  of the challenges that were going to await me that whole year..! So it ended up being a little monster compare to the other Crap I had to deal with afterwards! 

Now, back to the picture I took RIGHT ??!! Lol! 

This past few weeks, I've been wondering how I remember My mom telling me this..... "that I was getting ready to fly... how I became a butterfly and I'm about to fly... its coming...  you'll see''' it's  almost around the corner... keeeep PUSHING...Blah blah BLAH!!!!! LOL! 

And u know I was getting a little FEISTY, because I was likeeeeee !! Gossshhh, really??!!! how much does it take to just take off and fly?? ( that image in my head to me was like taking off on a Freaking Jet, at a thousand miles per hr in half a second)) 

Click here for a mental view.. LOL!

 

^^^^^^ I am pretty sure you get the picture here..<<< totally realistic Right??!!! I know!  Ha ha! 

But I am tired of "floating" my wings instead of "FLYINNNNNG"  and so I've gotten Fiesty.

 BUT then I saw this little butterfly upside down this morning and it dawned on me. ;-))))

And Soooo, 

According to the Wing Anatomy of a Butterfly..>>> Yes, Yes, I know I am a freaking NERD I can' help it...SHOOT ME!!!  LOL!!!! 

"When the fully-grown adult butterfly emerges from its pupa, its delicate wings are crinkled, wet, and uninflated. The butterfly hangs upside-down and pumps blood into the wings to inflate them. It must then wait for the wings to dry before it can fly. When the fragile wings fray or are torn, they do not repair themselves."

And you know that explains my Mommy's story.
My life, even though better than it was before, it does feel upside down sometimes.
Now, I know why... !! 

Even though I've become a "butterfly" and have beautiful "wings" they are NOT ready to fly much yet.. I got to strengthen them and wait for them to dry to become Stronger,.. A moment of  "Calm and Wainting " ((which I DO Not like by the way)) 

It's all simple, God is making sure that my set of wings are Strong when I get ready to Fly High, Very High Up!!!! ;-))) 

Corny and Cheesy!!!! I KNOW!! 

But I am Corny and Cheesy sometimes and that's Allright too... 

BUT I do BELIEVE on my MOMMY'S Story with Every Single Part of my Whole Being!!!! 

And I feel so loved and blessed that even in my most "Feisty" moments with God, He still answers me and sends me signals.. To nudge me and to remind me 

"Hellooooo, this is God, I am Here,!!! I can hear what your saying/thinking. And I do know what I am Doing!!!!"  

<3 <3 <3 <3 

Thank you God and I love you sooo soooo much Mother!!! 

Te amo Madre!! 

Keep Believing my friends, life is nothing But Pure Magic!!!! 

<3 Besos <3  

GOD #gotjokes but HE LOVESme so.

"God has never FAILED me, but He's sure scare me a few times"..

 

I'm pretty sure some of u can relate to this. Life is not perfect even though with our ignorance, we expect God most of the time to hand things easy to us... And Hey, I even  feel sometimes like that Man Upstairs #gotjokes. But I'm #grateful  that is during those trials and scary moments when he shows His grace for me the best, in those quiet moments of anxiety and anguish. I can feel him there with me, ALL THE TIME!! And He always rescues me..!!!! ((even on my most FEISTY moments I've had with Him.. Haha)) I have GROWN so much in the past few years, just by the things He's allowed to happened In my life, and Looking back it was all an opportunity for a better life for myself all along. Only when I made the choice of going through the toughest way and do things the right way, blessings and growth started to happen!! Still sometimes it feels draining and tiring but I'm grateful knowing that it can always be worse. There's always someone who is going through tougher times than us. And because of that I will never complain. 

Even though it may feel as He got jokes, He loves us. Things ALWAYS have a purpose and because of that Never Ever give up!! You can Do it, keep on PUSHING!!! 

<3 Besos <3   

Diva on the Loose signing off! ;-))) 

 #divagladiator 

GIFTS in the MIDST of CHALLENGES

I need to write more often here and I constantly have things in my mind, but haven't taken that time to come in here and do it.

But, you know the past 2 weeks have been challenging with unexpected events. And even though sometimes life with its challenges make me feel like I want to throw in the towel, I am grateful that I am surrounded with people that cheer me on and tell me "Keep going Mari, You can Do it".

On the midst of everything, God ALWAYS teach me something valuable. Little "gifts" that continue to help me grow as a better, stronger person. 

These past few weeks I have learn the "gift" of Perseverance because of an Immense Love For my family and the importance it was for me to be with the ones I love, to cherish a wonderful special accomplishment. So in the midst of that, I got the joy of spending a short but beautiful time with my family. 

I have learned the "gift" of Acceptance.  On how important it is to Accept that sometimes plans change, things happen and toes break too... Haha! ...But In the midst of that I've learned that there is Always Next Time and to cherish the quality time spend with family. 

And I have learned the "gift" of REST and Focus, this is a biggie for me especially when I'm such a Go getter x10 that sometimes I don't know how to calm down. I am  constantly wanting to go in life 50miles on a 15 mile zone... Haha! (Thanks Dad! ;-)) and I'm always wanting to do a Million things at once and forget to step back, look around and focus (Thanks Mom! ;-))... But in the midst of that I can appreciate the effort that people put to make me LAUGH!!!..(Thank U Braulio) 

I've learned that Challenges for the most part give us Opportunities for Bonding in a different way with those around us. And we learned a different appreciation for them!! I may NOT have tons of Money saved up in my bank Account, but I AM RICH, because of all the people that are in my life that supports me and Loves me unconditionally!! 

Thank u so much, you know who u are!!! 

Muah!! <3 Besos <3